[4] The Journey

Today I’ll be for the first time after my back injury back on a surf board. I am excited and anxious at the same time. I have no idea how well it will go, but I’m so keen to be back in the water, back on a board, and just live my life. Courage over comfort!

I am ready, rehearse some practicalities, catch the board, and get into the water; wave after wave. Walking, first, then I get the board down, get up and paddle. Further across the waves until I will find the one that will bring me back on my board.

The Ocean Heals

Here I go, my first wave after too long. Will my leg be strong enough to hold me up? Will my back be healed enough not to collapse? My doubts are gone as soon as I am on my board in the ocean; it feels like a second nature. The ocean heals.

Loving the Ocean

Earlier on in the morning I headed down to Chinaman’s Beach, where I simply sat down and watched the ocean. I could not think anything else nor feel anything else than about my love for the ocean. I am just loving the ocean. It is the only thought that goes back and forward in my mind, with every wave rolling back and forward.

The reflection of the sunrays on the ocean, like an endless mirror in which nothing else is visible except for the purity of the existence as such, the capacity to breathe, the ability to have a heartbeat.

The essence of being cannot be better captured than by this infinite and peaceful image of the ocean breathing and pulsing back and forward, the reflecting sun light, the light of life as such.

I love the Ocean

The eternal thought “I am just loving the ocean” is all what is on my mind, and in my heart. Nobody would get me out of that loop, where I watch as far as I could see the ocean, up ton the perfect horizontal line of the horizon.

The perfect horizontal line behind the unknown awaits us.
The perfect horizontal line behind the unknown awaits us. (c) Finfinnews

The Truman Show

The scenery reminds me of The Truman Show, the movie of which we all know that it reflects more about everyday life than about the actor solely. Don’t we all are playing our role in a limited setting which demands us not to question that very existence and functionality of the daily rites and habits?

Because once we start questioning, we might get lost. We might head out in the unknown ocean, and risk to get stuck in a thunderstorm, to drown and eventually never to return where we came from.

The fear is bigger than what we fear.

Yet, isn’t the fear bigger than what we actually fear? Would heading into the open ocean not be the only solution to find out what else is out there, which dangers and potential opportunities are there? Would questioning our daily rites and habits, the reality of our mere existence, not precisely create opportunities to grow?

The Fear is Bigger than What we Fear.
The Fear is Bigger than What we Fear. (c) Finfinnews

Courage over Comfort

Yet, questioning the status quo requires courage. Courage over comfort. Once you head into the open water, once you start questioning, and exploring other horizons, the certainty of life as such comes at risk. Once you pass that line, there is no way back.

And yet, only the first step is the most difficult, this one step is what really separates you from your reality and the potential reality. The first step is what really holds you back, because once you start walking, you’ll notice how it isn’t as scary after all.

Moreover, once you start going, you’ll notice how much more likely you’ll be to continue forward than returning on your steps. Once you cross the line, no matter if it brings you something better or worse, there seldomly is a way back.

You change once you cross that line, your thoughts, your behaviour. The limits in your mind break, making it is easier to cross the line again. Even if you return, the line will be broken, and it will be hard to resist not to cross it again, or question the firm beliefs of life at the known side of it.

Once you cross the line, there is no way back.

Courage Over Comfort. Always (c) finfinnews

Hence, Today I’m on my surf board, trying out how far my leg goes, how well it functions, and where my new limits are. Not even a year ago I couldn’t walk anymore, I couldn’t stand fiercely up for a long time, and now I am going to try to stand up on a surf board. Yes, I am.

Here comes the first wave, I paddle, I get up, and I stand up. Luckily, I surf goofy, which means that my left leg will carry most of my weight. My uncommon way of surfing – and snowboarding – often had caused others to make fun at me, but today I’m having fun precisely because of it! I wouldn’t have been able to surf if I was doing it the regular way, simply because my right leg has lost a lot of strength due to the back injury – one day it will be back as strong as it was, one day.

Courage Over Comfort. Always.

I love it! Being in the water, on the board feels like coming home. After the physical restrictions of the last month, I’m pushing myself back up, back in the ocean, through the waves, and explore new horizons.

Surrendered to the waves, watching the horizon, I realise how much our lives resemble the Truman Show, and how much I love it to go to the edge, despite the safety advice of others, and knock the artificial wall, the superficial limit of our existence. Go out, question the status-quo, and break the limits that are holding you back. There is so much more to explore, within and without you. It just requires courage over comfort. Always.